When I decided to start this blog, I told myself that I was going to be open about many different aspects of my life. I have always been a private person, but I am trying to change that. So, here I go again, peeling another layer of my insecurities off…
I am one of those individuals that would say I am pretty in-tune with my body. I know when things are right and when something feels completely off. Well, last month, I knew something wasn’t right. I started having a lot of symptoms that I thought was pregnancy.
- lower back pain
- abdominal fullness and pain
- leg cramps (it felt like I had ran 2 miles all the time)
- chest pain
So, I just knew I was pregnant. I think I took over 10 pregnancy tests throughout the month just waiting on the plus sign to appear. I had already diagnosed myself, stopped all caffeine, and started watching what I was eating. Then, the first of December hit, and I quickly realized I wasn’t pregnant (if you know what I mean). I decided to wait it out for a week or two and see if things leveled off. Well, they didn’t!
I called and scheduled an appointment with my OB-GYN, which I had yesterday. I am one of those individuals that will research something to death online. Doctors will tell you not to do that, but I can’t help it. So, I had the worst scenarios running through my head and even felt some depression hitting due to the unknown. But, as all the women out there know, we learn as wives and mothers not to let this depression show. So, I had it buried pretty far back so no one would know.
My grandmother died of ovarian cancer in 1992, and I am terrified that I will get it too. So, of course, that kept running through my head. I think my family thought I was nuts, but when you feel a knot in your stomach it is very scary.
So, after a complete pelvic exam and an ultrasound, my doctor (Woolard out of Cape, who I love) informed me that I had a cyst on my left ovary. Now, everything makes complete sense to me! After about 6 weeks, she said that I should be back to normal. I am hoping and praying this is true and I don’t have to go back in mid-January.
On the way home last night, all of my nerves, frustrations, and relief hit a peak and I just let it roll. For about 10 minutes I had a nice make-up smearing cry in front of my sister and husband. Sometimes, we need to let that bit of emotion go to be able to move on.
Through this small bump in the road, I have realized that life is so so short. We are never promised tomorrow, and your life can be taken away in an instant. So, I need to count my blessings everyday and make the most out of my time on this Earth. So, during this Christmas holiday, stop, look around, and acknowledge all of the people that make your life so special. Sometimes we are in such a hurry to get things done, to get from one place to another, and to complete a task that we forget about everything around us. I am really guilty of this! I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas holiday and Merry Christmas from me to you.
Thank you for reading my blog and caring about my thoughts, views, and information that I give. Love to you all!